Dearest dear ones,
My family, my friends, my life...
My family, my friends, my life...
It’s not that I don’t
love you.
I admire you, I need
you to be a part of me, wherever I go.
I love every nuance
of your smiles, the harmonies and melody of your laughter.
I love that you all
love each other so completely.
I adore the way you
have set up your lives, each with the other, to live and die as family.
When I come to see
you, I come to observe your way of living.
I am enthralled. I
cherish your devotion to each other, each and every one of you.
But I am not like
you.
I cannot simply
plant myself in one place, like a tree to be watered,
And grow up high
with my feet in the earth.
I cannot wither, I
cannot lose my leaves.
I must always be
moving.
The futures you wish
for yourselves, your dream come true,
That is like a death
sentence to me.
While many perceive
me as an oddity,
I feel satisfaction
in my wandering.
I am not a
spectacle,
I am a person, with
problems of my own.
I pay my monthly
mortgage in stress, endless workdays, self-scrutiny and loneliness.
I give more than I
take, to somehow apologize for the way I feel.
But I will not
apologize anymore.
My work is my love.
I am free.